My Grocery Game-Plan

    I love delicious food. I also love making it healthy and budget friendly. About a year ago my friend introduced me to the idea of reverse meal planning. Basically, you shop clearance at stores and then meal plan based on what you get. I was really bad at this but now I am much more creative with my meal planning and we end up wasting less food. You can learn about this approach by reading this blog https://sixonabudget.com/we-went-from-1500-per-month-on-groceries-to-233/ .

I have learned where I can get the best deals on certain foods so I will go to anywhere from 2-4 stores a week (it has become a strange hobby for me!) I wanted to share what I have learned now that I have it down to a system.

Ralphs (Or other Kroger stores) has the best clearance selection of all the grocery chains I have explored. I will check the produce section first for packaged cut up butternut squash, (for butternut squash mac n cheese) mushrooms, (to add to my ground meat) salad kits and then the bagged produce they sell for 99 cents. Their pantry clearance section is hit or miss[RB1]  but I have found great deals on healthy-ish snacks for kids, sparkling water, cereal and even wine! Then I will check the meat clearance section where I occasionally buy stew beef or steaks (Gianna’s favorite). Next is the deli section where I scrounge for deli meat but usually end up skipping this section (unless they have good quality hot dogs or kielbasa). They almost always have clearance rolls, bagels, cakes, donuts cookies etc. but I will just stick with bread or bagels for a treat. Lastly, I check for clearance organic milk (otherwise I just buy regular) as well as yogurt/cottage cheese on clearance. It is exciting to see what is on clearance, but you have to have self-control, or you could end up spending a lot of stuff you don’t really need.

                Grocery Outlet- I mainly go to for Lara bars (they are only 37 cents each and the flavors vary) and random snacks that are 99 cents. I will occasionally buy canned goods if they are cheaper than Aldi prices. They also sell the Costco size veggie straws for $3.99. They also have an awesome healthy food/organic section. I have found Lakanto monkfruit sweetner for $5.99 a GIANT tub of refined coconut oil for 9.99 as well as coconut MCT oil for $9.99. This has helped me follow the trim healthy mama plan without spending tons of money 😊

El Super is an amazing Mexican supermarket that opened near us!!! We get fresh corn tortillas that are cheap as well as most of our produce from there. They have insane deals on produce (3-4 lbs oranges for a dollar, 2 lbs zucchini for a dollar) and the quality is pretty good as well. This is great for us because we eat A LOT of produce!

After going to 2-3 of these stores, I go home and meal plan based on what I have at home and what I already have . I tend to stock up on ground turkey when it is around 2 dollars a lb and then chicken when it is closer to a dollar a lb so those are usually my proteins. Everything else that is needed I get from Aldi.

Aldi has the best deals for most things except produce. Almost every week I buy whole wheat bread, romaine lettuce hearts, cherry tomatoes and canned goods. I recently started buying dried beans and cooking them in the instant pot to save even more money. Aldi has great deals on dairy, lunch meat, eggs (under a dollar per dozen), frozen cauliflower rice and frozen fruit. Aldi is rapidly expanding so check out if there is one near you- you won’t regret it!

           I am blessed to live in a town that has all these stores within a ten-minute drive which makes this feasible while working part-time and raising toddlers. My kids come with me most of the time but occasionally I get to go shopping by myself and it feels luxurious :P If you don’t have these stores then I suggest you do some research/ ask around to find where the best deals are. We end up spending around 600 a month on groceries, diapers and eating out. I could definitely trim it down quite a bit but I buy certain staples even if they aren't on sale and we like occasional treats. In my next post I will focus more on what kind of meals we make and what some of our go-to quick recipes are 😊

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 [RB1]

Giovanni Paul is One!

                  Our second child has been such a huge blessing to our family. I wasn't sure how I would handle two kids under two, but Giovanni has been such a sweet baby and it has been easier than I expected it to be. That doesn't mean it has been easy all the time. Breastfeeding has been much easier than it was with Gianna and that has made feeding him easier. However, from birth to 13 months he pretty much woke every 1-3 hours at night and it was rough. Tim tried to help as much as he could, but Giovanni usually wanted me because I was the one who could feed him. Co-sleeping didn't really work most of the time but at least I could nurse him while lying in bed rather than having to get up to make him a bottle and sit in a rocking chair to feed him etc. Most people can't understand how I was able to survive that long with such broken sleep and honestly, I am not sure how I did it. I will say that prayer, family support and Giovanni's sweet temperament were crucial to my survival and well-being. I honestly felt like I was running on God's grace most days and it helped knowing so many people were praying for me. Another helpful thing was that Giovanni typically did not fight sleep like Gianna had. He would nurse back to sleep easily although he would occasionally wake up when I tried to transfer him back into his crib. Every morning he would give me the biggest smile and that helped me to get through the rough nights. He is seriously one of the most loving and sweet babies I have ever met. I think it helps that he has a very loving and caring big sister, but it seems to really be his personality. He seems to have a bit of St. John Paul II's love for humanity because he is always reaching out to strangers and smiling at them. Now that he can walk he loves to interact with people sitting next to us in Church and will often walk up to them and hold their hand. This week I had both kids with me while grocery shopping and I turned around to get something off the shelf and when I turned back to my cart I found Giovanni had reached out to a woman walking next to our cart and was holding her hand. He is seriously such a loving little boy and brings smiles to everyone he meets. I am beyond blessed to be his mother and watch him share his love with the world. It has been an exhausting year for both Tim and I, but we love Giovanni so much that it makes all the sacrificed sleep worth it.

                For the most part I have loved having two kids even though it can be challenging at times. Especially now that I have two toddlers it can be very stressful dealing with double the tantrums but there have also been a lot of benefits as well. Gianna is a very attentive sister and can help Giovanni calm down at times and since he was born she has been excellent at finding pacifiers for him. It is seriously awesome to ask her to go upstairs to find his pacifier or bottle etc and she will run upstairs and return with what I asked for. She is such an amazing sister and mom to her baby dolls. She spends a lot of time putting her babies to sleep or breastfeeding them and it is super adorable. Having Gianna as my firstborn has made the transition to two easier. I have had a lot of days when I feel like I can't handle it anymore but thankfully God blessed me with a sweet husband and two sweet children to give me the strength I need. I end every day exhausted and emotionally worn down from handling the constant demands from both kids, but I am also extremely thankful for them and happy. Motherhood is basically an emotional rollercoaster every single day. I have so much respect and compassion for all the mothers out there because it is really tough!

                At 14 months Giovanni is still a big cuddle bug and we love it. He prefers to snuggle with me most of the time, but he will pretty much let any family member or close friend hold him and he will snuggle with them, it is very sweet. He has a special bond with both of his grandfathers. We spent a few weeks in Washington last Christmas when he was only two months old. I remember when Tim’s Dad would come home from work he would sit with Giovanni on the couch and Giovanni would laugh at him. That was the first time he started social laughing and it was so cute. Since my parents live close he gets to spend more time with my Dad and when he sees my Dad he lifts his arms to tell my Dad to pick him up. When my parents watch the kids, Giovanni will refuse to go to sleep for my Mom because he wants my Dad to put him to sleep, it is very sweet. Aside from being a sweet cuddle bug, Giovanni keeps us on our toes by climbing everything. If we do not keep our dining room table chairs pushed in, he will climb them and climb on top of the table! He will climb pretty much anything. It is stressful, but I guess that is how life with boys will be. Another favorite activity of his is eating. He can be picky with some foods but when he loves something he will tilt his head back with delight and smile and occasionally he even holds the food up and sings. We love watching him enjoy his meals. He also still loves to nurse which has been a special bond for us. Now that he is older I usually just nurse him at home which is easier because he is quite the active nurser. Overall, he has a huge personality and we love our Giovanni Paul so much! I am looking forward to watching him continue to grow and develop over the years!

And then there were two kids!

         I can't believe it has been more than a year since my last blog post. I can explain! Ironically as I wrote my last post on my reflections on the first year of motherhood, I was already one week pregnant with baby # 2. I am so glad I already trusted that God would give me strength to endure any challenges prior to that pregnancy because being pregnant while chasing a toddler and working four days a week was no cake walk. My second pregnancy was easier in that I had slightly less nausea and less fatigue thankfully. I had new challenges in that I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes at 28 weeks. Thankfully my job as a Degreed Nutritionsit allowed me to understand and implement a diet that controlled my blood sugar and I did not require medication or special monitoring for my baby. At 34 weeks I was driving to work and noticed I had 3 contractions in 15 minutes. They never stopped. I was put on bed rest and tried to take it easy until 36-37 weeks but little Giovanni Paul Barbeau stayed in until 38 wks 6 days just like his sister! I couldn't even coax him out while his grandparents were visiting from Washington. Overall my second pregnancy was easier because I had Gianna to remind me how worth it everything was going to be. And I was so excited to see how she would be as a big sister!

          The day before Giovanni was finally born I came to the conclusion that the reason my labor was starting and stopping was that he was not in the correct position and couldn't descend further. Luckily I had copied directions for the "Adominal lift and tuck" from Hypnobabies which is a technique for getting baby to rotate when you are experiencing back labor from a baby facing the wrong direction. Tim and I had been sent home from triage early Friday morning because I was not progressing. I was so tired of having painful contractions that weren't making and progress! So after we got a few hours of sleep and ate breakfast I told him that he was either going to help me try to rotate baby or I was going to a chiropractor! Well we started around 930 and did the technique during contractions (it is kind of like the Heimlich!), It was extremely uncomfortable but I could tell it was working. They recommend trying 10 contractions but it only took about 8 before I felt the pressure shift and we were in active labor! After that my contractions were 2-3 minutes apart and I was screaming at Tim so we knew this was really time to head to the hospital. I survived the 30 minute drive to the hospital which I had been afraid of, it definitely wasn't easy though. I kept telling myself "I can do this, I don't have a choice!" and by the time I got checked out in triage and was 6.5-7 cm I was all about the epidural. I think I finally got into my room and had the epidural placed around 1:30. I remember texting Melissa, who would be his godmother at 3 pm that they were just waiting for me to dilate fully and I would probably push in 1-2 hours. Well Giovanni was born 7 minutes later. Hearing the time he was born and then seeing what time I had texted her, I couldn't believe it. Basically right after the text was send the Doctor came in to see how I was feeling and decided to check me super fast. Well he saw Giovanni's head called everyone into the room and I think I pushed 3 times and he was born! So much easier than my 2 hours of pushing Gianna out. And my recovery was way easier as a result as well.

          Giovanni came out looking like a grumpy old man and he was hungry! Within 15 minutes of being born he was sucking on his thumb and ready to nurse. Thankfully he latched well and ate for forty minutes and then ate every hour for the first 24 hours of his life. That was definitely a heads up to me that he was going to be a frequent nurser. Six months later he is still nursing every 2 hours mostly around the clock ! I am so grateful that I am able to nurse him and provide the milk he needs to grow. I plan to write more in a future post to encourage other moms who had difficulty nursing their first baby!

         Fast forward six months and I LOVE having two kids! Aside from pretty much never getting enough sleep to function (which is now 5 hours for me) it is going really well and I am happier than ever. I still have my dark days when I am up with him every hour and super exhausted but overall I find so much joy in watching my children grow and develop their sibling relationship. It does not surprise me that Gianna loves her brother so much and tries to take care of him but I have been surprised that Giovanni has been so interested in her since the beginning. He has been laughing at her since he was two months old! Gianna is legitimately good at helping me with him. She will tell me when he is crawling towards something he isn't supposed to have and she is good at entertaining him while I try to cook. Having two kids is definitely easier than just having Gianna and it is such a wonderful blessing. I will say having them closer together helps because Gianna still naps around 3 hours so it guarantees that I at least get to lay down with Giovanni. I also only went back to work two days a week so that has made things easier as well. I plan to share more in the future but I want to encourage anyone contemplating having a second child that it is definitely easier than your first!

Reflections on my first year of motherhood.

          I want to start off by saying that every sacrifice and challenge has been worth it. There have certainly been times that I wasn't sure of that but now when I look at my joy filled daughter and she smiles at me I know that I wouldn't change anything. I hope this can be encouraging to those in the throws of motherhood, especially adjusting to life with a newborn. Raising a baby and then raising a child is the hardest thing we will ever do. It is so challenging because we are not completely in control. Sometimes it does not matter how "good" of a parent we are, our child is independent and will still choose to defy us or completely go against everything we have worked for. Even though my daughter is only one it is so hard for me to handle when she looks at me and still does something I ask her not to do. And I know that this is just the beginning in a long life of lessons and growth for me. I am learning and growing in patience, love, self-sacrifice and so much more.

       Over the past year I have learned that I am so much stronger than I ever thought I was. More importantly, I have learned that God will never give me more than I can handle and that I am never alone. Sleep deprivation has certainly lead to some very dark days but then I think about how lucky I am to have my healthy daughter and I try to pray a prayer of thanksgiving and offer my small sufferings for those who are having difficulty conceiving. And there are some days that I am still grumpy and I take it out on my husband because I am not perfect but God is certainly working on my heart! I am also learning to not take things personally when my daughter does something she is not supposed to but it is so hard for me. She has been throwing her food/ sippy cup off her highchair and it really drives me crazy. I keep having to remind myself that she is learning what is acceptable and not acceptable behavior and that it is a normal part of development but it sure is challenging me!

       On the really challenging days, mostly when I am sleep deprived, I seriously doubt that I am cut out for motherhood. Who else has been there? I am willing to bet that a lot of moms feel that way because it is seriously tough. And I think there may be someone who wants to convince us that we can't handle it so that we close our hearts to more kids and he wins. The good news is that I am not alone, Tim balances out a lot of my short-comings and helps me to grow. Furthermore, God is helping me to become the mother that Gianna needs and I pray that the Holy Spirit helps me grow every day. And we have a community of love surrounding us! There are so many people who have helped to raise Gianna and she has benefited so much from it. And guess what? At the end of the day Gianna does not need a perfect mother, she only needs me. She needs me to love her. She needs me to love her father and God and then everything else will work itself out. As I write this I am reminding myself to focus on this and not get caught up in all the various parenting techniques there are out there. Love is the most important thing we can give to our children and the best lessons we can teach.

       Another important lesson is that motherhood is ENOUGH. A few nights ago I was talking with Tim about how I really want to get involved with a ministry. He cautioned me that I should not get involved with something that will take up a lot of time because my primary vocation is our family. I told him that I used to be super involved in college and that it's really weird to not be involved in a ministry right now. He told me that raising our child is the most important ministry that I can be involved with right now. Although there may not be much glory in it, he is right. I am not trying to downplay being involved in ministries because they are important but the family is the domestic church and where we learn to love. Since I work four days a week and Tim is currently taking an evening class it would be selfish for me to sacrifice time from our family to get involved in other ministries. For now I will focus on our family and in the future when Gianna is older I will start to bring her with me and teach her how to serve others and the Church. Parents please remember that your primary vocation is to love your spouse and your children and make sure that your other commitments are not taking away from that!

      Lastly I just want to share how amazing it has been to watch Gianna grow over the past year. I still get emotional when I think about how amazing it is that God allowed Tim and I to participate in creation with Him. And then she grew inside my body for nine months! In only a year she has grown to be half my height (even though I am short it's still quite the accomplishment). And she has grown into her own person with a huge personality. She absolutely loves people. She loves to talk to other people and babbles all day long. She loves music and starts to move her head side to side whenever she hears it and will often start to sing. She has recently started to have pretend tea parties and it is the most adorable thing ever. I love her so much and I live in constant awe of the fact that she is my daughter. I am looking forward to watching her grow over the years and I pray that we both have many years left on earth together!

What is the best answer to a world filled with violence and fear?

         Babies. This is not a pregnancy announcement but something I have really been pondering lately. I think we are all aware that there is a lot of scary things happening in our country and around the world. I will admit that I have been really worried and afraid some days. And then we had a bible study with some of our friends to go over the Sunday readings. It was the readings for the feast of Christ the King and the Gospel talked about how Jesus is the alpha and the omega. Jesus has always been. Along with that God has always had a plan for the world. He gives us free world but he also knows what will choose to do with it. God already knows all of the bad things that will happen in this world and he also knows how he will save the world. In a way he already has saved the world through Jesus, but at the end of time he will be victorious and if we choose to follow him we will enter into eternal communion with him and there will be no more violence, fears, or tears. God has everything under control .Should I say that again? GOD HAS EVERYTHING UNDER CONTROL. In other words we need to stop worrying about the future. It is difficult not to worry but this is where our faith in God can grow. We still need to pray for the grace to be able to trust God completely but we really need to stop worrying because it does not help us at all.

        Okay so what does that have to do with babies? When I have been reading about all of the violence in the world, I think about how much hate people are filled with and how much love they need. And then I see my daughter yelling at strangers trying to say hi to them and babbling away. She brings love and joy to strangers who may not have anyone in their life to smile at them. She brings the joy of God to others. I have become very convinced that the best way I can fight against the evil in this world is to raise my children to love others. If you have met my daughter you will see how her joy is contagious. I love it. She has no problem crawling up to people and smiling and laughing with them. And when I think about her growing up I know that she will make the world a better place in her own small way. Every child we bring into this world will impact the world in some way and we hope that it will be a positive way. It makes me so sad when people decide that they are done having children way before the end of their fertile years because they have no idea who they are missing out on. I can't imagine my life without my daughter. She is such a joy. Every child is so unique and special. And they will become an adult someday who can love and serve others and continue bringing joy into the world. I know that there are a lot of factors that determine how many children we can have but I ask you to please pray about it and consider being more open to life at this time if you are married.

         The world can be a scary place and I know a lot of people are afraid to bring children into this world. However, the world can also be a beautiful place especially within our homes if we bring Christ into our homes. We can overcome evil with the love of Christ and that starts in our home. We can't control the world but we can have at least some control over what happens in our home. And imagine if you have a loving home with 4, 5, 6, 7 or more children who become loving adults. Imagine how much that would impact the world! Being able to bring a child into this world is an immense blessing and we need to focus on that more. Children are amazing. Children are our future. Let's pray for our society to become more open to children.

“Do not abandon yourselves to despair. We are the Easter people and hallelujah is our song.”

― Pope John Paul II

Whats for Dinner : Take 1

            I really enjoy cooking and I think we do a decent job at eating healthy on a budget so I have decided to share more about our meals and join Simcha’s link up. My favorite websites that help me with meal planning are www.saymmm.com (where I store all of my favorite recipes) and www.cookinglight.com (where I get most of my recipes from!) Here we go

Sunday: Root Vegetable Minestrone

We had vegetarian friends over for dinner so I made one of our favorite vegetarian recipes. It is a perfect fall recipe with both butternut squash and turnips. When I was cooking I realized that I did not have any vegetable broth so I decided to try making my own. I used all the scraps from the vegetables I was cooking, added some spices and salt and then boiled it away for about 45 minutes. It turned out alright but next time I think I will try adding some ginger for a nice kick. I also omitted the bacon obviously. We actually used the crockpot to make it ahead of my Theology of the Body study group which worked out for the most part except that my husband added the pasta too early and it got mushy. All of the adults like it but the kids mostly ate bread and fruit, oh well! I forgot to take pictures whoops!

Root Vegetable Minestrone

Monday: Chicken Tortilla Soup

This is one of my favorite recipes, I love this soup! On Saturday I used the crockpot to cook the chicken ahead of time which also gave me a lovely chicken stock, it was awesome to have that prepared already when I got home from work. I use the recipe below as a base and made some small alternations. I used more chili powder and added some paprika. I also sautéed two green bell peppers with the onion to add more veggies. At the end I also added a can of rinsed black beans and quite a few squirts of lime juice. I found after many different attempts at making the perfect tortilla soup that lime juice is much more flavorful than lemon juice.

Chicken Tortilla Soup

Tuesday: Whole Wheat Pizza with veggies and pepperoni

I had to work late on Tuesday so I planned ahead for my husband to make this before I got home. We get whole wheat pizza dough at Trader Joes (it’s awesome) and then my husband added some sautéed onions, olives, mushrooms , feta cheese and mozzarella on top of some jarred tomato sauce. He added the pepperoni which I was not a fan of and did not feed to Gianna. Gianna ate a whole small slice, she loved it!

Wednesday: Taco Casserole

This is a super easy casserole to whip together on a weeknight. Tim was working late and I was able to entertain Gianna while I made it. I used ground turkey instead of beef and white corn tortillas instead of the chips.

Taco Casserole

Thursday: Caprese Turkey Burgers on Homemade Focaccia

Earlier this week I found a recipe for slow-cooker focaccia and I decided to try it. It turned out pretty well and I would definitely recommend it. I made a simple turkey burger with bread crumbs, Italian seasoning, and an egg. It didn’t hold together super well but it worked. And then I added a pesto spread, fresh mozzarella and sliced tomato it was delicious!

Slow Cooker Focaccia

Friday: We're celebrating my youngest sisters birthday so I won't be cooking! 

I will take more pictures next week! 

Raising up the Village and ending the Mommy Wars

                When I was taking my Certified Lactation Educator course, the instructor talked about how one of the biggest challenges women face today is isolation. Historically people lived in villages and helped each other out. Women learned how to breastfeed from other women and there was always someone to help if a woman was having a hard time. Motherhood and breastfeeding were at the center of the culture and community. Now it is more common for people to live far away from family and without that village to help with raising children. Raising children is tough, especially the first time around. I think a lot of the “mommy wars” stem from everyone just trying to do the best they can but still not sure if they are really doing a good job. In order to suppress our insecurity we compare ourselves to others and convince ourselves that how we are raising our children is superior and it makes us feel better. It is really hard to not compare myself to other moms and when I catch myself doing it I stop and remind myself that we are all just doing the best we can with the situations we are in!  We need community, we need support. I hope that if we can focus on helping other moms deal with their challenges rather than comparing ourselves we will all feel better.

We live three hours from my parents and Tim’s parents are up in Washington. I really wish that we lived closer but for the time being we need to stay here. I have recently been blessed that both my sister and brother now live within twenty minutes of us and it has been really great! Even though we live far from family, God has provided us with an amazing community. I wasn’t planning on getting pregnant during the time where our financial situation would require me to continue working full-time. I didn’t want to put my baby in daycare. However, we didn’t have to put our daughter in daycare because God brought two amazing people into our lives. Before Tim and I were even married we met Ben and Ivyvy at a relationship skills seminar hosted by St. Brigid’s which was 30 minutes from where we lived. We broke into small groups and ended up meeting them and discovered that they went to the same parish as us! Over the next few years they became some of our closest friends and we discovered that they only lived five minutes away from us. When I was pregnant I knew that I wanted to ask Ben to be Gianna’s godfather. I would have asked Ivyvy to be the godmother but since she is technically still Anglican she could only be a Christian witness. After Gianna was born and we realized that I would have to go back to work they offered to help watch her for free! They work from home and are able to have a flexible schedule. It has been such a blessing and a help to us and Gianna truly loves going to their house and has formed a very sweet relationship with them. I just can’t believe how God has put them into our lives. Another great example of our community is that earlier this week I asked if anyone could help watch Gianna for a day next week and my sweet friend Rita is actually taking the day off from work to watch Gianna. I was just blown away by her kindness. We couldn’t raise Gianna without this extra support God has provided us with.

Another great source of support has been my parent’s frequent visits down to help us with Gianna. It has been really wonderful watching them interact with her and to see how much she loves them. When Tim got sick a few weeks after Gianna was born, my mom stayed with us and took over his part in helping me with her. I would not have been able to keep pumping without her help. I can definitely see how we weren’t designed to raise children on our own. Both their lives and the lives of others are enriched when they help us raise them.

I have been blessed to have many other young mom friends who have also been a great support during this time. In addition to that I also have the internet to connect me with many other moms. Reading other blogs and participating in facebook groups for moms has been so helpful. I no longer feel alone but supported and encouraged. I have received advice on a variety of topics from sleep issues, feeding questions and even how to start disciplining an older baby. I really hope that we can stop the mommy wars and just focus on how we can support other moms in this difficult stage of life. If you see another mom acting judgmental please realize that she is probably insecure in her mothering skills and try to encourage her and be gentle!  Let’s focus on helping each other rather than comparing ourselves. We all fall short, we all do things we thought we never would and it’s okay. Let’s be gentle on ourselves because motherhood is the toughest thing in the world!